Mallam Sule bought a new bullet proof jeep for N75M.
So, he went to warri and while there, he was attacked by armed robbers who rained bullets on his car.
To Sule's amazement the car resisted all.
He started mouthing words at the bandits.
One of them gestured that he could not hear him, so he wound down his window and shouted “Shege dan barao waka,
He has since been buried according to Muslim rights
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
The Monkey Family
A black guy and a white man were sitting in the park.
The white man had a pet monkey and a black guy was selling bananas.
So the black guy said "Mr. can u look after my bananas I am going to the toilet". "Oh yes go ahead" said the white guy.
When the black guy came back there were no more bananas and he went mad, "where are my bananas?" The white guy said "ask your brother", pointing at his monkey.
The black guy just chilled. Then the white guy said few seconds later, 'can u look after your brother I am going to the toilet. The black guy said ok.
When the white guy came back the monkey was dead and he went mad asking "what happened to my monkey?" The black dude said "Mr. don't get involved, its a family matter!!!"
The white man had a pet monkey and a black guy was selling bananas.
So the black guy said "Mr. can u look after my bananas I am going to the toilet". "Oh yes go ahead" said the white guy.
When the black guy came back there were no more bananas and he went mad, "where are my bananas?" The white guy said "ask your brother", pointing at his monkey.
The black guy just chilled. Then the white guy said few seconds later, 'can u look after your brother I am going to the toilet. The black guy said ok.
When the white guy came back the monkey was dead and he went mad asking "what happened to my monkey?" The black dude said "Mr. don't get involved, its a family matter!!!"
Thursday, May 13, 2010
The Worst Day Of His Life
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.
Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."
"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."
"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."
"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."
"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Three Guys At The Bar
3 guys were gisting at a bar. The 1st guy said when my wife was pregnant she was reading a book; a tale of 2 cities & gave birth 2 twins.
The 2nd said his wife was reading d 3muskteers and gave birth to 3plets.
The 3rd guy dropped his beer bottle & started running home. When they got to his house they saw him burning a book & they asked why. He said his wife was reading Ali Baba and the 40 thieves and she is pregnant; not in dis house…it cant happen!
Complete and Finished
A man went to face an interviewer. Board of Directors asked him,
“Tell the difference between“COMPLETE” and “FINISH”.The man replied, I am
clarifying with the example, “When u marry a right person you are
“Complete”and when you marry the wrong one you are “Finish (ed)”.
My Husband Is Here!
A wife was sleeping in the middle of the night, she suddenly shout:
"Get up quickly, my husband is here!!'',
the man gets up from the bed, jumps out the window, hurts himself and then realizes; "Damn i am the husband"
Hubby's Underwears
Wife goes to Woolworths, sees men's underwear on
sale. She buys a dozen of the same colour.
Goes home and gives hubby.
Hubby protests,
" Why buy me same colour? People will think I do not change
underwear!! Wife asks,"Which people?"
sale. She buys a dozen of the same colour.
Goes home and gives hubby.
Hubby protests,
" Why buy me same colour? People will think I do not change
underwear!! Wife asks,"Which people?"
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Worst Report Card
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an Envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.'
With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.
Dear Dad:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.
I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it' s not only the passion, Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy.
She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.
We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.
We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.
In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.
Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.
1 Love, Your Son John.
PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I 'm over at Tommy's house.
I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report card That's in my center desk drawer.
Call me when it's safe to come home.
With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.
Dear Dad:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.
I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it' s not only the passion, Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy.
She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.
We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.
We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.
In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.
Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.
1 Love, Your Son John.
PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I 'm over at Tommy's house.
I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report card That's in my center desk drawer.
Call me when it's safe to come home.
Free Of Charge
The boss came early in the morning one day and found his
manager kissing his secretary.
He shouted at him, "Is this what I pay you for?"
The manager replied: "No, sir, this I do free of charge.
manager kissing his secretary.
He shouted at him, "Is this what I pay you for?"
The manager replied: "No, sir, this I do free of charge.
Senators
A priest walked into a barber shop in Surulere, After he got his haircut, he asked how much it would be. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the Lord."
The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 prayer books and a thank you note from the priest in front of the door.
Later that day, a police officer came in and got his hair cut. He then asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the community."
The next morning, he came to work and there were a dozen donuts and a thank you note from the police officer.
Then, a Senator came in and got a haircut. When he was done he asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the country."
The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 Senators in front of the door.
The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 prayer books and a thank you note from the priest in front of the door.
Later that day, a police officer came in and got his hair cut. He then asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the community."
The next morning, he came to work and there were a dozen donuts and a thank you note from the police officer.
Then, a Senator came in and got a haircut. When he was done he asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the country."
The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 Senators in front of the door.
Sex On Sunday Morning
On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her.
When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."
Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having intimacy would surely be asking for trouble.
"Oh no, my dear, " replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong."
She paused, wiped away a tear and then continued, "And if that damned ice cream truck hadn't come along, he'd still be alive today!"
When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."
Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having intimacy would surely be asking for trouble.
"Oh no, my dear, " replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong."
She paused, wiped away a tear and then continued, "And if that damned ice cream truck hadn't come along, he'd still be alive today!"
Catholics in Hell
A guy dies and is sent to hell. Extremely frightened because of that, he is very surprised when he arrives; beach, palm trees, sun is shining, happy people around in shorts and bikinis.
Behind the next corner there are people eating great food and there's some cool music playing.
After some time of wondering, a man in an expensive suit approaches him and says: "Hi, you must be the new one. Welcome to hell, I'm the devil. As you're gonna spend eternity here, make yourself comfortable and have a drink. If anything bothers you, always feel free to ask me."
The guy still doesn't really understand what's going on, this is not what he expected; But finally he decides to inspect the area.
Everywhere he goes, there are people laughing and having a great time, there's games, party and fun all around. Then he arrives at a steep cliff that divides the paradise hell from an area underneath, and there is hell as we know it: demons torturing the doomed, there's fire and the smell of brimstone.
Shocked, he runs to the devil and says "Devil, how can that be? Here, we have the sweet eternity and down there people are tortured and burned! How can that be?!"
The devil laughs and says "Oh, that. That's the Catholics - they want it that way."
Behind the next corner there are people eating great food and there's some cool music playing.
After some time of wondering, a man in an expensive suit approaches him and says: "Hi, you must be the new one. Welcome to hell, I'm the devil. As you're gonna spend eternity here, make yourself comfortable and have a drink. If anything bothers you, always feel free to ask me."
The guy still doesn't really understand what's going on, this is not what he expected; But finally he decides to inspect the area.
Everywhere he goes, there are people laughing and having a great time, there's games, party and fun all around. Then he arrives at a steep cliff that divides the paradise hell from an area underneath, and there is hell as we know it: demons torturing the doomed, there's fire and the smell of brimstone.
Shocked, he runs to the devil and says "Devil, how can that be? Here, we have the sweet eternity and down there people are tortured and burned! How can that be?!"
The devil laughs and says "Oh, that. That's the Catholics - they want it that way."
The Rabbit and the Bear
Once upon a time, there was a river. The Nile River, to be precised. On one side of the river lived the rabbit, and on the other side lived the bear.
One fine day, the bear was sitting on a stump, enjoying his breakfast of berries. Then he heard someone yelling at him. It was the rabbit.
"Hey! Hey, Teddy, get your butt over here. I've got something to show you!"
"Not now! I'm eating."
"Oh come on!" said the rabbit. "It's really important."
"No way."
"Please. It's urgent."
So the bear decided to go all the way over the wide river. It took him all day and all night to get over to the other side. He nearly drowned. And when he finally got there he was groaning and panting, and wheezing for air.
"Well, rabbit," he panted. "What did you want to tell me?"
"Hey, Teddy," the rabbit began, "look how many berries are on the other side of the river."
One fine day, the bear was sitting on a stump, enjoying his breakfast of berries. Then he heard someone yelling at him. It was the rabbit.
"Hey! Hey, Teddy, get your butt over here. I've got something to show you!"
"Not now! I'm eating."
"Oh come on!" said the rabbit. "It's really important."
"No way."
"Please. It's urgent."
So the bear decided to go all the way over the wide river. It took him all day and all night to get over to the other side. He nearly drowned. And when he finally got there he was groaning and panting, and wheezing for air.
"Well, rabbit," he panted. "What did you want to tell me?"
"Hey, Teddy," the rabbit began, "look how many berries are on the other side of the river."
Monday, May 3, 2010
The Nun On Bro. John's Shoes.
A nun woke up one morning feeling great, she got out of bed and decided to go to the kitchen for some breakfast.
On her way over there she runs into sister Jane and she says, "Hi sister Jane," by which sister Jane says, "I see you got off on the wrong side of the bed sister. She did not understand what sister Jane meant by that so she ignored it and went on.
She was passing by the garden when she ran into sister Roberta and she says, "Good morning sister Roberta I am having a great day. Sister Roberta says, "I see you got off on the wrong side of the bed."
The nun was wondering why everybody she met kept saying that when she felt great so she decides to go and see mother superior.
She asks mother superior, "Everybody keeps telling me that I got off on the wrong side of the bed when I feel great and mother superior says,"That is because you have brother John's shoes on."
On her way over there she runs into sister Jane and she says, "Hi sister Jane," by which sister Jane says, "I see you got off on the wrong side of the bed sister. She did not understand what sister Jane meant by that so she ignored it and went on.
She was passing by the garden when she ran into sister Roberta and she says, "Good morning sister Roberta I am having a great day. Sister Roberta says, "I see you got off on the wrong side of the bed."
The nun was wondering why everybody she met kept saying that when she felt great so she decides to go and see mother superior.
She asks mother superior, "Everybody keeps telling me that I got off on the wrong side of the bed when I feel great and mother superior says,"That is because you have brother John's shoes on."
The Pool With Hungry Alligators
A CEO throwing a party takes his executives on a tour of his opulent mansion. In the back of the property, the CEO has the largest swimming pool any of them has ever seen.
The huge pool, however, is filled with hungry alligators.
The CEO says to his executives "I think an executive should be measured by courage. Courage is what made me CEO. So this is my challenge to each of you: if anyone has enough courage to dive into the pool, swim through those alligators, and make it to the other side, I will give that person anything they desire. My job, my money, my house, anything!"
Everyone laughs at the outrageous offer and proceeds to follow the CEO on the tour of the estate. Suddenly, they hear a loud splash. Everyone turns around and sees the CFO (Chief Financial Officer) in the pool, swimming for his life. He dodges the alligators left and right and makes it to the edge of the pool with seconds to spare. He pulls himself out just as a huge alligator snaps at his shoes.
The flabbergasted CEO approaches the CFO and says, "You are amazing. I've never seen anything like it in my life. You are brave beyond measure and anything I own is yours. Tell me what I can do for you.
The CFO, panting for breath, looks up and says, "You can tell me who the hell pushed me in the pool!"
The huge pool, however, is filled with hungry alligators.
The CEO says to his executives "I think an executive should be measured by courage. Courage is what made me CEO. So this is my challenge to each of you: if anyone has enough courage to dive into the pool, swim through those alligators, and make it to the other side, I will give that person anything they desire. My job, my money, my house, anything!"
Everyone laughs at the outrageous offer and proceeds to follow the CEO on the tour of the estate. Suddenly, they hear a loud splash. Everyone turns around and sees the CFO (Chief Financial Officer) in the pool, swimming for his life. He dodges the alligators left and right and makes it to the edge of the pool with seconds to spare. He pulls himself out just as a huge alligator snaps at his shoes.
The flabbergasted CEO approaches the CFO and says, "You are amazing. I've never seen anything like it in my life. You are brave beyond measure and anything I own is yours. Tell me what I can do for you.
The CFO, panting for breath, looks up and says, "You can tell me who the hell pushed me in the pool!"
A Boy Once Prayed
A boy once prayed:
Dear God,
Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones,
why not keep and save the ones you have now.
Thank you God for the baby sister you gave me, but what I
prayed for was for a puppy.
God, maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each if they had
their own rooms, it works with my brother.
Dear God,
Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones,
why not keep and save the ones you have now.
Thank you God for the baby sister you gave me, but what I
prayed for was for a puppy.
God, maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each if they had
their own rooms, it works with my brother.
God Needs A Vacation
God is tired, worn out. So he speaks to St. Peter, "You know, I need a vacation. Got any suggestions where I should go?"
St. Peter, thinking, nods his head, then says, "How about Jupiter? It's nice and warm there this time of the year."
God shakes His head before saying, "No. Too much gravity. You know how that hurts my back."
"Hmmm," St. Peter reflects. "Well, how about Mercury?"
"No way!" God mutters, "It's way too hot for me there!"
"I've got it," St. Peter says, his face lighting up. "How about going Down to Earth for your vacation?"
Chuckling, God remarks, "Are you kidding? Two thousand years ago I went there, had an affair with some nice Jewish girls, and they're STILL talking about it!"
St. Peter, thinking, nods his head, then says, "How about Jupiter? It's nice and warm there this time of the year."
God shakes His head before saying, "No. Too much gravity. You know how that hurts my back."
"Hmmm," St. Peter reflects. "Well, how about Mercury?"
"No way!" God mutters, "It's way too hot for me there!"
"I've got it," St. Peter says, his face lighting up. "How about going Down to Earth for your vacation?"
Chuckling, God remarks, "Are you kidding? Two thousand years ago I went there, had an affair with some nice Jewish girls, and they're STILL talking about it!"
Woman-to-Woman!
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!" "What's the problem, Eve?" "Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedic snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above. "Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples." "Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you." "What's a 'man,' Lord?" "This man will be a flawed creature, with many bad traits.
He'll lie, cheat, and be vainglorious; all in all, he'll give you a hard time. But, he'll be bigger, faster, and will like to hunt and kill things. He will look silly excited, but since you've being complaining, I'll create him in such a way that he will satisfy your, ah, physical needs.
He'll be witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a ball about. He won't be too smart, so he'll also need your advise to think properly." "Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow.
"What's the catch, Lord?" "Yeah, well, you can have him on one condition." "What's that, Lord?" "As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant, and self-admiring, So you'll have to let him believe that I made him first, So, just remember, it's our secret, Woman-to-woman!"
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above. "Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples." "Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you." "What's a 'man,' Lord?" "This man will be a flawed creature, with many bad traits.
He'll lie, cheat, and be vainglorious; all in all, he'll give you a hard time. But, he'll be bigger, faster, and will like to hunt and kill things. He will look silly excited, but since you've being complaining, I'll create him in such a way that he will satisfy your, ah, physical needs.
He'll be witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a ball about. He won't be too smart, so he'll also need your advise to think properly." "Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow.
"What's the catch, Lord?" "Yeah, well, you can have him on one condition." "What's that, Lord?" "As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant, and self-admiring, So you'll have to let him believe that I made him first, So, just remember, it's our secret, Woman-to-woman!"
Rest And Let The Poison Work
Augustine was dying.
His wife sat at the bedside.
He looked up and said weakly, "I have something I must confess."
"There's no need to," his wife replied.
"No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!"
"I know, I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work"
His wife sat at the bedside.
He looked up and said weakly, "I have something I must confess."
"There's no need to," his wife replied.
"No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!"
"I know, I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work"
I'm Gonna Save it!
Jojo and Jaja were trying to light a match.
He struck the first one and it didn’t work, so he threw it away.
He struck the second match. That didn’t work either, so he tossed it.
Jojo struck the third one and it lit up.
“That’s a good one!” he said, blowing it out. “I'm gonna save it!”
He struck the first one and it didn’t work, so he threw it away.
He struck the second match. That didn’t work either, so he tossed it.
Jojo struck the third one and it lit up.
“That’s a good one!” he said, blowing it out. “I'm gonna save it!”
The Nun And The Cab Driver
A cabbie picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and the cab driver won't stop staring at her.
She asks him why is he staring and he replies, "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you.
She answers, 'My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun a long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything.
I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."
"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me." She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2 you must be Catholic.
The cab driver is very excited and says, Yes, I am single and I'm Catholic too! The nun says "OK, pull into the next alley.
He does and the nun fulfills his fantasy. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts
crying. My dear child, said the nun, why are you crying?
Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied, I must confess, I'm married and I'm American.
The nun says, "That's OK, my name is Kelvin and I'm on my way to a Halloween party.
She asks him why is he staring and he replies, "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you.
She answers, 'My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun a long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything.
I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."
"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me." She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2 you must be Catholic.
The cab driver is very excited and says, Yes, I am single and I'm Catholic too! The nun says "OK, pull into the next alley.
He does and the nun fulfills his fantasy. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts
crying. My dear child, said the nun, why are you crying?
Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied, I must confess, I'm married and I'm American.
The nun says, "That's OK, my name is Kelvin and I'm on my way to a Halloween party.
Male And Female Flies
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter.
What are you doing? She asked.
Hunting Flies, He responded.
Oh! Killing any? She asked.
Yep, 3 males, 2 Females, he replied.
Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell?
He responded, 3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone.
"3 on beer can are males and the 2 on phone are for sure ladies"
What are you doing? She asked.
Hunting Flies, He responded.
Oh! Killing any? She asked.
Yep, 3 males, 2 Females, he replied.
Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell?
He responded, 3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone.
"3 on beer can are males and the 2 on phone are for sure ladies"
Shan, The Late Comer.
Shan came into the office an hour late for the third time this week and found the boss waiting for him.
What's the story this time, Shan? he asked sarcastically. "Let's hear a good excuse for a change.
Shan sighed, "Everything went wrong this morning, boss.
The wife decided to drive me to the station. She got ready in ten minutes, but then the drawbridge got stuck.
Rather than let you down, I swam across the river – look, my suit's still damp – ran out to the airport, got a ride on Mr. Thompson's helicopter, landed on top of Radio City Music Hall, and was carried here piggyback by one of the Rockettes.
You'll have to do better th an that, Shan, said the boss, obviously disappointed. No woman can get ready for anything in ten minutes.
What's the story this time, Shan? he asked sarcastically. "Let's hear a good excuse for a change.
Shan sighed, "Everything went wrong this morning, boss.
The wife decided to drive me to the station. She got ready in ten minutes, but then the drawbridge got stuck.
Rather than let you down, I swam across the river – look, my suit's still damp – ran out to the airport, got a ride on Mr. Thompson's helicopter, landed on top of Radio City Music Hall, and was carried here piggyback by one of the Rockettes.
You'll have to do better th an that, Shan, said the boss, obviously disappointed. No woman can get ready for anything in ten minutes.
Naija Elections
Twenty Four hours After United States concluded the Presidential election.
The winner Mr Barack Obama is celebrating his victory.
The Nigerian President has just arrived to the United state with his entourage to congratulate him.
"This is really surprise" said Obama to the Nigerian President
"American are advanced, they know the results immediately after the election"
"See You" replied the Nigerian President.
"We Nigerians are more advanced, we always know the result even before the election"
The winner Mr Barack Obama is celebrating his victory.
The Nigerian President has just arrived to the United state with his entourage to congratulate him.
"This is really surprise" said Obama to the Nigerian President
"American are advanced, they know the results immediately after the election"
"See You" replied the Nigerian President.
"We Nigerians are more advanced, we always know the result even before the election"
Marriage Proposal
An elderly widow and widower were dating for about five years.
The man finally decided to ask her to marry. She immediately said "yes". The next morning when he awoke, he couldn't remember what her answer was! "Was she happy? I think so, wait, no, she looked at me funny, "
After about an hour of trying to remember to no avail, he got on the telephone and gave her a call.
Embarrassed, he admitted that he didn't remember her answer to the marriage proposal.
"Oh", she said, "I'm so glad you called. I remembered saying 'yes' to someone, but I couldn't remember who it was."
The man finally decided to ask her to marry. She immediately said "yes". The next morning when he awoke, he couldn't remember what her answer was! "Was she happy? I think so, wait, no, she looked at me funny, "
After about an hour of trying to remember to no avail, he got on the telephone and gave her a call.
Embarrassed, he admitted that he didn't remember her answer to the marriage proposal.
"Oh", she said, "I'm so glad you called. I remembered saying 'yes' to someone, but I couldn't remember who it was."
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